How to know if you are tethered, and what to do about it

Untethered with Jen Liss

26-10-2023 • 24 mins

In a world that often seems fixated on perfection, where the pressure to meet others' expectations can feel overwhelming, it's easy to lost sight of who you truly are.

Come with me to explore the profound significance of untethering from perfectionism, pleasing and other people's expectations to reclaim your authentic self. As someone who has (and is) continuing to unravel this for myself, I know the challenges of waking up one day and wondering, "Who the heck am I under all these masks?"

So many of us wake up one day and realize the societal and external pressures have completely shaped our sense of self, and it can take a bit to come back home to what is truly aligned for us. The truth is that pleasing and perfectionism can hinder our creativity, personal growth, and our ability to have true and genuine relationships. It is worth the pain of untethering. Truly, it is.

In this episode, I share ways to identify where you might be tethered, and offer you some ways to break free from the ropes that bind you so you can unleash your imperfections. These are what make you truly unique and magical – the unicorn who you are.  It's okay to set your brilliance free!

So pull out your satchel of magical self-compassion as I encourage you to embark on a journey toward self-acceptance and a life that is in coherence with your true self.

Remember, unicorn: You cannot rush the untethering. Let it unfold exactly as it should.

Signs you might be tethered:

  • You're worrying a lot about what other people want or need
  • You're worrying about what other people think
  • You're procrastinating or you're putting things off
  • You're asking everyone else for advice, and nothing is helping you gain clarity

What to do about it:

  • Become present. Use a tool like breathwork, meditation, or any other simple mindfulness practice, even a creative practice like the Color Walk we learned from Rob Walker a few weeks ago.
  • Meet yourself where you are, and accept it. Have compassion for yourself in moments of frustration.
  • When you catch yourself wanting to rush, remind yourself that you can trust that everything is happening for you in perfect timing.

Today's breath practice: Leaning into trust

This Thursday Thread episode pulls a thread from Tuesday's episode featuring Dawn Calvinisti.

Support the show

Are you feeling the call? I'm hosting a FREE live event Wed Feb 28 and Thurs Feb 29 at 10:30 am PST. Free Your Voice so you can start making your biggest impact in the world. Register at

My PodcastNOW program is now open for enrollment. Join now.

Join Brilliant Breathwork, the monthly membership offering multiple weekly live breathwork sessions with Jen and other trauma-informed facilitators, an extensive vault of replays, and a supportive community for authentic, creative, and radiant growth.

Other ways you can support:

  • Share an episode and tag Jen on Instagram @untetheredjen
  • Follow/subscribe to get updates of new episodes
  • Leave a review!

Connect with Jen

Music created and produced by Matt Bollenbach