Breaking the Parenting Cycles with Bonnie Lenz

Scrub Caps & Sippy Cups

11-01-2022 • 41 mins

Hey moms and parents! Bonnie Lenz is here, coming to talk with you about something important. It's something that many of us struggle with, and it can be tough to break the cycles of bad parenting we may have grown up with. But it's definitely worth trying to do better for our kids. So let's get started!

There is a lot of pressure on parents to do things "the right way." But what if the right way isn't actually working? In this episode, we'll be discussing how mainstream parenting techniques aren't always practical and how alternative methods could be more beneficial for families.

Bonnie is a survivor of child abuse and emotional abuse as an adult. She has three amazing children with her supportive husband Cory. Bonnie’s children are her best teachers and they have inspired a lot of her healing and passions.

After years of healing, and with loving support, Bonnie was able to set a freeing boundary in 2020, and shortly after that, she was inspired to create The Sunflower Parent Movement which launched on Mother’s Day of last year. She wanted to help those who are parenting break unhealthy cycles, raise awareness about evidence-based parenting, and advocate for abuse awareness and prevention.

She has come to believe that conscious, respectful, and positive parenting practices hold the key to ending generational cycles of trauma that contribute to abuse prevention.

Bonnie is a Registered Nurse and wanted to help others, but was being a people pleaser, blamed herself, and found that nursing took a big emotional burden on her. She turned gears and started a nonprofit in the hopes of helping others through counseling, coaching, and various resources.

Mainstream parenting goes against what may be developmentally appropriate. Bonnie explains how there is a lack of understanding surrounding childhood development and parenting through those stages.

Bonnie tells us that mainstream parenting isn’t backed by evidence nor is it effective. The ladies discuss spanking and how using spanking can be a cycle as it’s passed down from previous generations.

Bonnie discusses looking for the unmet need in your child - creating safety (remove the child from the situation), observing what you see, validating feelings, and fulfilling the need that the child seeks. She also gives us some great tips on co-regulation!

Ellen explores her childhood and relates that to how she is a parent today. She tells how her culture didn’t allow emotion and how she has changed that with her kids. Bonnie adds how we can easily react poorly when we as adults aren’t regulated. She encourages us that it’s ok to feel.

Crystal and Laci mention how this episode has brought up a lot of thoughts and questions related to their childhood. Perhaps it will do the same for you and be a starting point to great discussions. We would love to hear your feedback! Messages us on IG.

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